A Setback

Two and a half weeks have passed since I ordered my digital camera. Two and a half weeks of anticipation, of waking every morning with the excitement of wondering "Will this be the day it finally arrives?" I have tried to be patient, to make allowances for the holiday weekend and my over exuberance which made the time drag. However I came to the conclusion that Something Went Wrong. So Monday I tried to call my sales rep at Gateway to find out what the hold up was. I received her voicemail, so I left her a brief message with a request to return my call. She didn't. Tuesday I tried again, with the same results. So today I called a different rep there and inquired about the status of my order, only to be told that it had been cancelled due to a problem on their end! My sales rep didn't even have the decency to call me and inform me of what had happened. So I'm sitting here waiting for a camera that was never going to arrive! I can't tell you how livid I was, but I sure told the poor man who was unlucky enough to take my call. In mid-rant I realized that this error was not his fault. I calmed down and apologized. We discovered that not only did the other rep not fix the problem, she never did the paper work to credit my gift cards back to me, so that they appeared to be used! I muttered a few choice words to myself and the man quickly filled out the paperwork on his end so that he could process my order. As things stand now, my order is in the works and he promises to check on it everyday until it ships to make sure it goes through this time. I have his number, the service number and the order number. I let him know what I thought of the other service rep in a calm but firm manner, and thanked him for all of his help. I'm just so disappointed that this happened. Now I have to wait another two weeks or so it would seem. If they don't screw it up again. I'm so bummed!

To help cheer myself up I took the What Kind Of Dog Are You? test. I'm a German Munsterlander, loyal and adaptable, etc. This has excellent graphics. If you're interested, follow the link and then find the link to this game/test on that page. Sorry, it doesn't let me link directly to the test itself. It's ten easy questions. The show it promotes looks rather interesting, too. Unfortunately, I doubt it will air in the states. At least not for a couple of years, and then we won't give you poor Brits the credit, just to be upfront about it. *G*

Nancy's Pride and Joy

Here's the picture I drew for my mother-in-law's birthday, as described a few posts ago. Today is a busy day, but perhaps on Thursday I'll have time to work on the Spirit Guide painting which has persistently haunted me for several days now...

MIL's face is clearer on the card than in this image. It doesn't look much like her, but as it makes her look younger I don't think she'll mind. *G*

On Terri Schiavo

I was not going to post anything on this situation. However I found this letter in my inbox today which so eloquently states my thoughts exactly, I have decided to share it.

March 21, 2005
Dear Members and Supporters of The Interfaith Alliance:
Over the past several hours many of you have been kind enough to share
with us your thoughtful reflections and questions regarding the tragic
situation involving Theresa Marie Schiavo. Several of you have
inquired as to whether or not The Interfaith Alliance has taken a
position on the end-of-life issues swirling around Mrs. Schiavo or on
the involvement of the United States government in this case by way of
votes in the United States Senate and in the United States House of
Representatives on Sunday evening and early Monday morning respectively.
The Board of Directors of The Interfaith Alliance has not adopted a
position on end-of-life issues or directed the staff of The Interfaith
Alliance to give attention to these issues either in our policy work or
our educational efforts. I cannot speak for them or for the
organization on these issues. However, I am astonished, appalled, and
grieved by the actions of the two houses of the United States Congress
and the White House that have prompted me to write this personal letter.
The life-and-death issues brought into focus by Mrs. Schiavo's sad
condition involve medical questions and legal considerations far too
complex for me to address without more information. I might add that,
in my opinion, members of the United States Congress would have been
well advised to adopt a posture of humility and compassion related to
these issues as they impact Mrs. Schiavo and her family. Neither Members
of Congress nor any of us have any business seeking to dictate
procedures for members of a grieving family and numerous doctors,
lawyers, and courts that already have considered the familial, medical,
legal and personal issues involved in this situation and attempted to
address them with fundamental moral, medical, and legal values.
As a pastor for many years, I repeatedly have stood with troubled
families grappling with the issues that surround Mrs. Schiavo's
bedside. Those experiences have taught me the myths that often get
perpetrated as facts in public debates regarding circumstances like
those involving Mrs. Schiavo. No perspective regarding a resolution for
such a difficult situation has all of the weight of compassion and
wisdom behind it
Alongside my concern for the family of Mrs. Schiavo stands my concern
for our nation. A family's grief over the loss of a loved one is
being compounded by pontifical posturing among politicians and religious
leaders who know too little about the situation even to comment on it
much less to attempt to control it. A tragic situation is being made
more tragic by the insensitive intrusion into it by Washington
politicians seeking yet another venue for speaking to their partisan
constituencies and for strengthening their political "base." For
Congress and the White House to jump into this tragic situation at the
last minute, after years of court proceedings, and to take a position on
the value of life so inconsistent with, if not contradictory to, many of
their other decisions, represent unconscionable meddling in the private
decision of an American family—a family who needs our thoughts and
prayers, not our spirit of blatant judgment and our not-too-subtle
politicization.
Profound questions disturb me. Are there no limits on the intrusive
reach of this government? Where will Washington go next? Do claims
of both religious and political authority give a government the right to
invade the spheres of personal autonomy and religious independence?
How long will the American public wait for such questions to be
answered.
Dear friends, all of us would do well to step back from the bedside of a
woman caught somewhere between death and life, divorce our political
initiatives from this realm of personal and familial pain, pray for the
peace of Terri Schiavo and her family, and after taking a hard look at
how we feel about politicians who are willing to manipulate even
personal pain in an effort aimed at political gain, decide what we are
going to do about our democracy.
Sincerely,
Rev. C. Welton Gaddy
President, The Interfaith Alliance

Illustration Friday-Crowded

Here's a quick pencil drawing I did for Illustration Friday. I wasn't paying much attention and was dismayed when I realized that the finished person looked a lot like the cousin I have been feeling angry with! Guess I need to talk to her. Funny how art or writing can bring those things to the surface. Anyway, I erased her image and made the face look more cartoonish.

Anthropologist Annie felt crowded as the walls closed in around her...

Grumpy, Sleepy and a Few Other Dwarves

I'm feeling tired and stressed tonight. It's as though many of my buttons are being pushed simultaneously and I'm overloaded. I don't feel like going into it. I'll be fine. I just need a break.

On the positive side my visit with my grandmother went well. She was bright and cheerful. Today was one of her good days, though she kept referring to Randy as "Rudy." He didn't mind though. She didn't know him before her memory started to go. Randy knows it isn't intentional. Heck, half the time she thinks I'm my mother! *LOL* There are worse people to be mistaken for.

I have three art projects in the works: a birthday card for my mother-in-law, a sketch for Illustration Friday and a painting that's been floating around in my head all week. This is the one I most want to get to, but feel I need to put off until the other two are taken care of. It has to do with Native American Spirit Guides. I see it clearly in my mind, the question is can I get it out? This is one I'm willing to spend a lot of time on to get it right. If it eventually works out, I'll share it here. It'll be a watercolor. My mother-in-law's card is going to be a drawing of her walking a potbellied pig on a leash. Why? Because she has always wanted one as a pet but my father-in-law won't let her. She has any number of cats and two grayhounds. Their youngest daughter, who still lives at home, has also had a parade of rabbits and other critters. So he's not being unreasonable in finally putting his foot down. Still, she really wants a pet pig. Therefore I'll draw her with one. Her birthday is Wednesday; that's my deadline for that project.

As for my IF project, I'm really not wild about this week's theme. I have plenty of ideas, I just don't feel very inspired yet. You will of course see what I come up with soon however.

And if my camera is not delivered to me first thing tomorrow, I'm calling the company and demanding to know why!

That's all I've got. I need some sleep.

For My Grandmother

Randy and I will be meeting my mother and sister tomorrow at the nursing home. We'll be having lunch with my grandmother, the one with alzheimer's. She still remembers who I am after a couple of minutes and I play along by pretending I don't notice that she's fishing for hints as to my identity. She still knows that she knows me, so my presence doesn't concern her while she figures out who I am. I know this probably sounds sad, and it is I suppose. But I have known for a long time that this was coming and have been able to prepare myself for it. I simply love her, no matter what, as she always did for me. She's technically my step-grandmother, but she took me into her heart and always treated me as if I were one of her own grandchildren. I love her.

So for Easter this year I took the time to draw her a card.

To those of you who celebrate Easter, have a wonderful holiday!

To everyone else, have a terrific day too! :0)

The Office and NBC

Here's a pet peeve of mine: the way American networks revamp BBC shows and air them as if they were their own. They don't claim that they're being original, they just don't advertise the fact that they aren't.

I realize that this is not a new phenomenon. It just bugs me.

Anyway, NBC was the latest to do this with their version of The Office. I watched the BBC version a few times and enjoyed its offbeat sense of humor. I watched the American debut the other night. It's still offbeat, and it's still funny. It misses sometimes, but I think it will take time to find its footing. It's a good show and I'll probably watch it occasionally.

I simply resent the way NBC touted it with the raves of the critics, for all the world as though they were the ones who had come up with the idea in the first place. :0P

Make Your Own Holiday

For many, this weekend is a holiday weekend steeped with deep religious meaning. To them I would like to start out by saying Happy Easter!

I started thinking about holidays- religious or otherwise- and decided to ask you this: If you could create a holiday, what would it be? Pick any day of the year and declare your holiday, telling us the story behind it if it isn't immediately obvious. Be as funny or serious as you like.

And no, you cannot declare every day a holiday. It would defeat the purpose. ;0)

Misadventure

I looked out my window at 5:15 this evening and the view was uneventful. Everything was a dull sodden gold or brown, with only small patches of snow after a recent thaw. Boring. I plunked myself down in front of the television for two hours of my personal guilty pleasures- Angel and Charmed. Angel has now progressed to a point where I have seen all the episodes being aired. But as I have now seen a season or two that I missed I don't mind watching these over again. This time I understand some things that went over my hairdo before because I was missing vital Angel clues from the past. But no more! Now I know. As for Charmed, though I know it's been around forever I only started watching the reruns a couple of months ago.

But this entry is not about my- some might say- questionable taste in television viewing. I mention this only to point out that I was oblivious to the world for two hours as only those immersed in television can be. If you looked at me I suspect I would have been slack-jawed with glazed eyes.

I emerged from this quasi-hypnotized state to grab some things together to head to my meeting. I got to the end of my breezeway and stopped dead. There in the darkness sat my car under a thick layer of snow! I muttered vile things under my breath as I went back into the house to change into a more appropriate coat. Then I went back out and cleared off my car, spitting snow as I went along because it came down so hard. I jumped in my car and proceeded to drive on what I hope was the road. Could have been my neighbor's yard though for all the visibility I had. Good thing they've moved and the house is for sale...

About a quarter of a mile from my house I wondered why I was doing this to myself. Then I remembered that I am the group's treasurer and tonight I was supposed to give my treasury report. It was too late to call and cancel. I had to go. I continued on. Despite poor visibility I didn't think much snow had accumulated on the roads so I headed for my usual shortcut. This was not one of my wisest decisions. Perhaps my brain was going soft from two hours in front of the tv? Anyway, it was my decision and I own it. I chose the shortcut.

Over a steep, narrow, winding mountain road. Brilliant, eh?

So I got about three-quarters of the way up when my car sat me down and had a little heart-to-heart with me by skittering towards the ditch on a steep upgrade. We reached the mutually satisfactory conclusion that I should turn the car around and go back down the mountain. As I did so, however, my car became overzealous to leave this benighted place. It lurched forward, slipped on the ice and went up a snow bank on the other side of the road! I was frantic because there's a curve just above where I landed, and my car stuck out across the road. I did mention the road is narrow, right? If someone came sliding down the mountain from the other direction, well, let's just say I wouldn't have to worry about whether Leo and Piper ever get back together again on Charmed.

Fortunately it would seem the mountain was no more eager to visit with us than we were to linger. My tires quickly found traction and I was able to get the car back on the road properly, this time facing down. I threw the car into low gear and crept back down the slope. If my car had a tail it would have been between its legs. If it had legs, that is.

I went back to the main road and took the long way to my meeting, which I left early so as to avoid ever-worsening roads. See? Sometimes I learn from my mistakes.

P.S. John, I told you that if I made it home you would know by my blog. And here I am. Now I'm hoping that you made it home safely, too.

News Overdose

So here it is, almost 4am and I have been unable to come up with something to blog about. It isn't as if there aren't plenty of news items to rile me. There's way too many, truth be told. Right to die, right to live, coalition killing insurgent, insurgent killing coalition, civilians killing after deciding that too many have died, children going on killing sprees here, Canada allowing seal hunting, ANWR going forward, government officials making my skin crawl at the sound of the voice or even of their names. The environment is disregarded by those who should know better and in whose hands so much depends. News items that leave me asking "How could they be that stupid?"

With all of this and more going on, sometimes it's hard to pick one topic and run with it here. I'm just so sick of it all, but to discuss it is just too overwhelming. To read the news is to be left wanting to kick or punch or tear something apart. Something inanimate, just so we're clear.

I don't know if it's sleep or a vacation I need. But I guess I had something to blog about after all.

Illustration Friday-Bloom 2

This is a more traditional take on this week's Illustration Friday topic, Bloom than my previous entry. This is actually a card I made for my mother whose birthday is in a couple of days. I know it has a more childish air about it, but it's all meaningful for her. She loves flowers and gave me some Black-Eyed Susans when I was starting my own garden here. When I was a little girl we used to go berry picking together. Most significant is the rabbit, which has always been her pet name for me. It has something to do with the way I curled up on my stomach when I slept as an infant. So here's my birthday card for my mother which I am also submitting to IF as a less abstract interpretation of the theme:

That and This

While taking a shower today I started to wonder why we never have a simple rain shower in this area anymore. We only have thunderstorms. Not that I have to worry about them yet; it's supposed to snow soon so a thunderstorm is hardly imminent. It was the soothing sound of the water from the shower head pattering on the floor of the bathtub. It reminded me of childhood days of long walks in the rain, splashing in puddles. The sorts of fun things that you can't do with thunder rumbling overhead and lightning illuminating the sky, looking like electrified veins brought to the surface of the skin. I miss a simple, gentle rain.

On another note, I have added a link to a friend's website under "Of Interest" on the lower left. Wordswordswords has catalogued every book she has read since 1982 along with her thoughts on the book. This is not a typical blog, though you can post comments. Instead it's an alphabetized listing of books which she has read and reviewed. Perhaps you'd find it of interest. It is called, appropriately enough: Some Books I've Read Since 1982.

Finally, my treadmill is still working me hard. It hasn't skipped town yet causing me to forego a workout. No. It is a dedicated treadmill that taunts me until I agree to change, stretch and hop aboard. It is a sadistic taskmaster, but I am grateful for it. I have a tendency to be lazy and need the nudging its stern presence provides. I work out for increasingly longer periods of time, with more and more sprints thrown in. It calls me names if I don't. Really. By the time I step off the thing I am dripping in sweat, catching my breath and attempting to keep the world in focus. I always feel as though I am gliding on air rather than walking when I cross the room afterwards. But I feel good. I feel proud of myself as I tuck the slave driver away until the next day when the process begins again. When did I get this out of shape? I don't need the machine to scoff at me. I'm doing a pretty good job of that myself! I am sad, but I will get better.

However if I disappear, you will know that the treadmill ate me.

Truly.

Shopgirl At Last

At long last I have finished Steve Martin's Shopgirl. I wonder if this reader's block I'm suffering from will ever end? I used to read 7-8 books a week. While I now think that's too much, even one book a week would be a vast improvement from where I'm at now. I've barely read anything -relatively speaking- in the past year. Which is crazy when you realize I have had nothing but time this year to read. Hmph.

Anyway, I read this book and enjoyed it very much. It started slowly for me; it was bleaker than I expected initially, especially with Martin as its author. It picked up though and I was happy with the way things fell out in the end. It was a good book.

Evolution Censored Again

I was reading the New York Times today and came across an interesting article. A New Screen Test for Imax: It's the Bible vs. the Volcano chronicles how some Imax theaters are refusing to show movies that mention evolution- even in passing- because religious fundamentalists might not like it. I thought and felt a lot of things while reading this article, but if I boil it down and put it as nicely as I possibly can, my response is:

What nonsense. If they don't like it, they don't have to go and see it.

Illustration Friday-Bloom

Sorry folks, but I've got a painful ear infection and I can't seem to think very clearly tonight. That being the case, here's a little eye candy. Believe it or not, this was made from my Illustration Friday-Sorrow entry. In an abstract way, it fits this week's theme of "Bloom" so I'm going to go ahead and submit it. The flower is at its heart. I have something else I plan to submit later in the week as well. You can have up to 3 submissions in a week, so why not? It's already done anyway, I just didn't feel like scanning it in tonight. Here's my first entry:

Here I Am

Ok, so here's the deal. The Powers That Be at Illustration Friday have decided to post the new IF topic on Fridays instead of Monday. They have it set up so that as soon as a new topic is posted, the prior submissions are archived. Therefore when they post a new IF topic tomorrow/today, the Fragile topic will disappear on their site and the new topic will take over. So from now on, my Illustration Friday submission will be posted here on Thursdays. Makes sense, right? I know. They wanted to give people a chance to work on their projects over the weekend. Would have made more sense if they posted the new topic on Saturday morning instead, with Friday remaining the deadline. But I'm not the organizer of the thing. So from now on I'll post it on Thursdays. Or whatever day I feel like I guess. It doesn't seem to matter.

I'm a little tense tonight. I go to the doctor for the last time for my wrist later today. This is the session where he tells me the permanent level of disability, and what my disability rating is for the purposes of workman's comp settlement. A lot of where I go from here vocationally depends on the outcome of this meeting, and my nerves are ratcheted up a little as a result. I just keep pushing it out of my mind and focusing on good things instead. Such as Ladder 49. I watched this with Randy tonight. It wasn't what I expected. It was better. Randy is a volunteer for the local fire and ambulance squads, and in many ways we can relate to movies such as this one. Fortunately Randy had already seen it and was able to warn me of a scene with rats so that I could look away. I have a phobic fear of them. One nice thing I can say about them though is that their cries are very melodic. When you have spent your life listening to them rather than looking at them whenever they appear on screen, you notice these things. They sound like birds singing. Fascinating. Still, the little buggers give me the creeps. One too many dreams of being eaten alive by them when I was younger. No need to shrink wrap me on this one folks, it's already been done. Dreams of them are a stress indicator for me. The problem is that my dreams are so very vivid, so graphic, that it has translated into a phobic fear in waking life. But it's one I can live with.

Anyway, they only appear very briefly towards the beginning of the movie so I was able to relax and enjoy it. It was sad, but good.

Oh, and I have used my treadmill every day so far. I feel better both physically and emotionally, exercise being one of my favorite ways to burn off stress as well. It really was a wise investment in my overall health.

I think that's all I've got tonight. I'm not feeling particularly humorous, snarky, clever or wise. I am, at the moment, Just Me.

Illustration Friday-Fragile

They are switching some things over at Illustration Friday so I needed to post my submission today. Here you go. The topic was Fragile. For some reason I thought of sick children. My first attempt- the one which failed- was of a premature baby in an incubator. Instead, I give you a child such as one you might find at St. Jude's Children's Hospital.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Happy St. Paddy's Day to anyone who might care. In honor of the occasion, you are a modern leprechaun. What's your biggest gripe?

Fingers With Two Left Feet

I hate when my imagination exceeds my talent. Sometimes I can vividly see something in my mind but when I try to draw it or mold it or capture it on film, I can't. Such was the case tonight. I was trying to sketch out my idea for this week's Illustration Friday submission, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get my fingers to cooperate. I had many concepts for this week and I can do one of the others instead. However I have this stubborn streak that makes letting go of this difficult. Perhaps one more go at it tomorrow is in order before I give up and move on to one of the others.

I bet that happens to some of you as well. It doesn't have to be art-related. But haven't you ever had a clear idea or image of how you wanted to do something, only to be frustrated in the attempt to actualize it?

Portrait of the Ridiculous

I had a different sort of day today. My dog Sam had a date with the vet for his yearly exam. This meant that they needed me to bring in a stool sample as well. They didn't specify but I thought it safe to assume that they meant a sample of his, not mine. That being the case, I had a challenge before me.

On the nicest of days and best of conditions, I don't hang around outside watching my dog poop. It simply doesn't happen. Therefore the fact that I was doing so on a blustery cold day while there's about two feet of snow on the ground set off some warning bells in Sam's head. He kept looking back at me as I cleverly stalked him, scuttling from breezeway to tree, etc. around the yard. I tried to appear uninterested in what he was doing, but I don't think I fooled him for a minute. It was all too unnerving for him and he kept returning to the house, business left unfinished so to speak. Back inside we'd go for an hour or two until he'd request to be let out again. So I would let him out and hurriedly bundle up in coat and boots and try to surreptiously follow him once more.

It took all day but I was finally triumphant about 45 minutes before his appointment.

If one can call the ability to scoop and bag dog poop a triumph. Personally, I have my doubts.

Good, Evil and Inspiration

And so I did it. I ordered my camera which should be here Wednesday or Thursday. Hurray!

I also bought a treadmill which Randy put together for me in admirably short time. They didn't have the one I wanted in stock and I was getting ready to find a sales associate so I could order it when I noticed that for only $30 more I could get a pretty nice one. This one is motorized where I was looking at a manual model before. So I splurged and purchased this one instead. We were about halfway home when I started cackling hysterically to myself. Anyone else would have been scared but Randy is used to me and simply said "What?" The ugly truth of the matter folks is that I have a sadistic streak in me. I wouldn't act on it, but it's there just the same and I have to own that I had had a particularly evil thought in that moment in the car. For it suddenly occurred to me that with a motorized treadmill, the belt would keep running whether I was on it or not. Would it be so wrong, I wondered, if I were to drop my cat onto the machine while it was running??? To fully optimize the experience I would have to wait until I have my new camera so I could capture the look of stunned horror on her face as she was rapidly transported backwards.

Now now. No nasty notes. As I said, I would never actually do such a thing. It was just funny to think about for a moment. She senses the darkness within me and keeps a safe distance from me whenever I look at her with a twinkle in my eye. As I ran on the contraption tonight, both she and the dog were curled up on the couch watching me suspiciously out of the corner of their eyes. The male cat, Patches, stayed hidden away altogether. Wisest of the bunch, that one! *G*

As for why I might want a treadmill, that's easy. It's still a frozen wasteland outside my door with even more snow predicted over the next few days. I want to run. Gym membership is a waste with my wrist. Time to adapt. But the single greatest motivator to get me off my lazy butt was reading The Longest Mile by Jonathan Segal and Ken Ottmar. This is the hilarious blog of two journalists who are trying to prepare for the Big Sur Marathon. I've been following their progress for some months now and even mentioned this before here on my blog somewhere (too lazy now to look it up) and I can't get enough of these guys. As much as they make me laugh, though, they have inspired me as well. So I bought the treadmill and intend to use it, too. When tempted to skip it, all I have to do is read Segal and Ottmar to get me going again. Whether or not they complete the marathon, I respect and admire their attempts. But I hope they do it!

The only thing missing from my life right now other than a president and administration that doesn't make me want to hurl, would be a nice big blueberry muffin. Someday soon I may have to write an entry dedicated to the addictive nature of blueberry muffins. But not tonight.

Pardon Me

I can't think of anything to say. I'm buying a cheap treadmill later today which I'm rather happy about, and I plan to order a (not cheap) digital camera- a Canon- from Gateway as I have gift certificates from there.

But that's all I've got for now. I'm having a brain fart.

From My Mailbag

When I opened my email tonight, Lo and Behold there was an email whose subject line read: Increase Your Girth and Length!

Now, being a woman I can only assume they were referring to my waist.* In which case I have this to say in response:

1. If there's one thing I don't need, it's help increasing the girth of my waist. I have a million and one very pleasant ideas on just how I might go about achieving that goal should I choose to do so. But thanks for the offer of help.

and

2. Ow. Really. Being a full-grown adult, I can only imagine that any attempt to increase the length of my torso would hurt. While at 5'6 I am not the tallest person I know, still I do not feel the need to change my stature.

Should I suffer severe brain trauma and change my mind however, I'll be sure to let you know.

*Yes, I am aware of what this really referred to; I'm having fun.

Blogger

Dear Blogger-using Friends,

It seems you do not exist. For while I go to your sites and read what I believe are interesting and thought-provoking blog entries, when I attempt to comment, I am told that "The blog you were looking for was not found." This held true for every single Blogger blog I tried.

Now, I know that I am occasionally a verbose pain in the, well, you get the picture. However I am not paranoid enough (yet) to believe that you have all banded together to block me out. Therefore I can only assume that Blogger was malfunctioning tonight. I will get back to you when Blogger ends my Time Out. Know that I was thinking of you, and if that doesn't frighten you, perhaps it should. ;0)

Illustration Friday-Ancient

The topic for this week's Illustration Friday was Ancient. There were so many different ways to go with this, but this is what I chose. My submission was done in pencil and watercolor.

Time For Some Fun Again

You're in a battle with you mortal enemy. Which power would you rather have:

1. The ability to turn any liquid to jello gelatin

2. The ability to chronically chap your opponent's lips

3. The ability to chant limericks until your opponent's eyes glaze over, i.e. not long

While considering your choices, keep in mind that your opponent has the ability to temporarily stun you with his toxic belches. In other words, his power is equally lame.

What shall it be? And if you're feeling creative, tell us how the scene will play out.

Dale Palmer, Jr.

Here's a sketch of my father, drawn in part from a bad photo and therefore largely from memory. The computer lost some detail, still this is a pretty good likeness and I'm proud of it:

Marking the Day

By rights today should have been very difficult for me. It was a year ago on March 8 that my father gave up on life and ended it with the blast of a gun.

Truth be told, I didn't dwell on it much today.

When I thought about it, I felt sad. I felt overwhelmed a little. Angry too of course. Mostly I think "What a waste" when I think about what he did. But then with a mental shrug I would move on with my day.

Tonight when I logged on there were two emails for me from one of his sisters. One email was asking why I'm not planning on coming to a family party they're throwing this weekend. She has only just heard that my paternity has been called into question by the judge, and she assumed my reluctance had to do with issues surrounding money. Insulting, that. It has far more to do with the way the family has not treated me as family. So I decided to wait before responding to that one, until I can formulate a proper response.

Her other email was all about how she plans to help my father to his eternal rest by having him baptized by proxy, which could only happen a year after his passing. She has it in her head that he needs this and wants this done so he can pass on. Which is interesting because he was not in the least religious. His father, my grandfather, complained all through the masses said for him after he died because he knew as I did that it wasn't what my father would want. It was done for my grandmother, who would pass away herself in June, and for all of my aunts who are religious. I don't really have a problem with my aunt's need to do this now, except that she claims she is doing it for him. This is something she needs, not my father. But if it makes her feel better, so be it. I'll keep my mouth shut. Just a good thing my grandfather is back home in Mexico, so he doesn't have a conniption.

So after reading these two emails and dredging up the past year and all of the awful feelings, yes, I'm pretty sad and out of sorts now.

All Things Cool

Lots of things to share with you tonight-

Political
First of all, it appears that Connecticut is going to legalize civil unions of gay couples. It is not the marriage that some activists hoped for, but others feel it's a step in the right direction.

New Middle Eastern Comic
At long last the Middle East is getting its own comic book heroes. After reading the article, I found myself wanting to read this book, and I haven't been into comics since I was a kid...

Artistic
A friend emailed me a link to a wild and fun site. It's like plunging into a work of art, and the art is Bosch and Escher and Dali all rolled into one. Check it out.

Update on Blogger vs. Journalist

An interesting development has occurred. For the first time, a blogger has been granted access to cover a White House briefing. This would seem to negate a recent California judge's ruling that bloggers are not journalists. I believe Dan was right when he posted to my earlier blog entry on this issue, in which he posited that some bloggers meet journalistic standards and should be treated as such.

My thanks to the FaerieWizard for the story.

Vacation by Imagination

I'm feeling tense tonight, and my mind keeps wandering off to a time and place I would rather be. In my mind, it's summer and I am camping at a state park on the beach. I could't swim last year because of the cast from hand to elbow, and I doubt I could swim more than a few strokes now, but that isn't really the point.

I want to float on my back and bob on the waves to the rhythm of the surf. I want to feel the sun baking the salt onto my skin. I know I would burn horribly, but at that moment I wouldn't care. I want to roll over and dive below the surface to see whatever there is to see. When I'm tired and have had enough, I want to lay on the sand and warm up again. Then I would grab up my camera and hike along the rocky neck that stretches out from this particular beach. It's full of tide pools with fascinating marine life. If the way becomes too precarious with my camera, I can turn back and walk up to the stone pavilion on top of the cliff behind the beach, or along one of the many trails. There's so much to see and photograph!

When the sun sets and the temperature drops a little, I would head back to camp and cook a nice meal- surf and turf perhaps?- over the open fire. I find fire to be hypnotic. I love the way it dances, the crackling sound it makes while it devours its fuel and the sound of the wood resettling as it collapses upon itself. I want to sit next to the fire with a cup of coffee in my hands and stare up at the crystal-clear night sky and listen to the mysterious sounds of the wildlife moving in the woods nearby. I want to share whispered thoughts and observations with my husband through it all, until finally climbing into the tent and curling up for the night.

I feel more relaxed just thinking about it.

A Card for Lolly

I spent the day today getting a gift for a friend's birthday. Instead of buying a card I decided to paint one. She's the type of friend who won't care if it looks like crap. She appreciates the effort. She's a landscape artist, so I chose to paint dogwood blossoms. This is my first attempt to paint flowers so they're a little rough...

After driving and shopping today, I can safely say that the world is too crowded here on weekends. I should have gone a couple of days ago, when the chances of personal injury due to being cut off and pushed around in a store were greatly reduced.

Blogger vs. Journalist?

The lawsuit brought against bloggers by Apple has led to California judge's ruling that bloggers do not enjoy the same protections afforded to mainstream media. A blogger does not have the right to protect their source.

Realizing that as bloggers there may be some bias, still I ask your views. Should bloggers be allowed to protect the identity of their sources and be treated as journalists under the law? Or don't we qualify? And if you fall somewhere in between, what if anything do you feel needs to happen in order to afford those protections to bloggers and their sources?

Illustration Friday-Jazz

The Illustration Friday topic this week was Jazz. This was more difficult for me because I don't particularly care for that kind of music. I considered skipping this week, but I decided I would rather try to make myself accept the challenge of working on something that doesn't interest me so much. It's a simple pencil drawing which I scanned in, then overlaid the image with blue via PSP. Here are the results:

Domiciles

I don't feel well tonight. I had a headache earlier which has mostly passed but left me feeling drained. Therefore rather than be serious tonight I have decided to pose another one of my "philosophicals" instead. It's been about a week since my last one. Here goes:

Would you rather live in a pumpkin shell, or a house of cards?

Bonus: Would you rather live in a luxurious mansion that was built entirely of dirty, sweaty gym socks but which had every other amenity?

Justice

My faith in my fellow man and the possibility of a return to sanity has been bolstered by the news today.

Donald Rumsfeld is being sued by 8 of the torture victims of Guantanamo. The ACLU and Human Rights First are bringing the case on their behalf, and their lawyers are working pro bono. Bush may have let Rumsfeld off the hook, but it would seem that some of us aren't quite so willing to let him walk. I wish the victims and their champions the best of luck. My thanks to Deborah for making me aware of this initially. This entry of hers actually contains more info than the MSNBC article.

Closer to home in more ways than one, the court has abolished the Death Penalty for juveniles! I have strong feelings about the so-called juvenile justice system since my brother was falsely convicted of arson at the age of 15 and sentenced as an adult. Though out of prison now, he still lives in a hell of his own because of the experience. I can't imagine how much worse everything would have been if the crime he was convicted of had carried a death sentence. We live in CT, which still has the death penalty. I could go on and on about this subject, so I'll stop here by saying that its abolition is past due, and I am overjoyed at its demise. Er, so to speak.