Recently in Tales from a Bookstore Category

While kidding around with someone (Mo) at work today, he said something about "your brilliant mind" to me.  Pretending to pluck my brain, I offered it to him and said "Here, you can have it!"

A few seconds later he came up to me and said "Seriously, with your mind, what are you doing here?"

And now I have to digress for a moment.

A week or so ago one of my supervisors (Mike) was having a bad day.  "You're doing the right thing, going back to college." he said to me.  "You've got to get out of here, got to better yourself."  And I have to say that, while I understand where he's coming from, the concept that I am somehow "bettering" myself rankles me.  I'm changing.  I'm growing in a new direction.  But I am not becoming a better person.  You don't need a college education, or even a high school diploma, to be the best sort of person there is.  Period.  And I was bothered that he said this at full volume while my  coworkers were walking around us.  It denigrates them, and it denigrates him.  Furthermore, for what it's worth, there's absolutely nothing wrong with working there permanently if that's how the deal falls for someone; it's honest work.  Mike is a nice guy who feels tired and ground-down most of the time.  He can be pretty funny, but that day he was feeling his age and his regrets.  It showed.  I'm not angry with him, but troubled by the mentality- one which he shares with a large portion of the population, I think- behind it.

So when my friend Mo came up to me today and asked me why I'm working there, I thought of Mike's comment, and I felt saddened once more.  "Why wouldn't I work here?  I need a job, this place is flexible and accommodates my school schedule,  and I'm surrounded by books.  What more could I ask for?"

"Oh, okay.  It's helping you get to where you need to go.  That's alright then."

The subtext being: You're not staying here like the rest of us.  Good for you!

"There's nothing wrong with working here!" I sometimes want to shout.  "It's not exciting, but it's good work that pays more than minimum wage and allows you to make your own hours!"

Three paper cuts and a fingernail torn to the quick later...

"Seriously, what am I doing here???"

On my pick list at work yesterday, I saw "Practical Poetry Curse."

Cool, I thought.

When I pulled the title, though, it was actually "Practical Poetry Course."

I like mine better.

Here are the highlights:

- My grandmother's memorial service is a week from today.  I'm ok.  I'm sad, of course, but a little happy too.  She's free of her illness, and I like to think that, wherever they are, she's reunited with her husband at last.

- I'm still only pulling a B+ in both my Human Bio and Statistics classes, but both profs assure me that I can get an A.  That is, of course, my goal.

- My PTK advisor approached me a couple of weeks ago.  She's the school's representative for the Jack Kent Cooke scholarship, one which you can only apply for if you're nominated by a scholarship rep.  I'd never heard of it before, but Sharon wants me to apply.  For a variety of reasons, I don't actually think I'll be receive one, but it's an honor to have been asked.  I'm applying anyway; I could receive up to $30,000/year if awarded!  Can't hurt to try.

- My Child and Adolescent Psych prof is teaching Behavior Modification next semester.  It's by invitation only, and he's asked me to sign up.  Again, an honor.  It isn't my favorite treatment method, despite its efficacy, but it is effective.  It doesn't look at underlying causes for behaviors; it only eradicates them.  They may return, or manifest in a new way if the cause(s) aren't addressed.  That being said, there will be times when I'll need to refer a client to a behaviorist as a supplement; I need to understand what my clients will be going through.  I've already informed my cats and my brother that they will be my first test subjects when I've finished the class.

- Illinois Institute of Technology and Marymount Manhattan are both tirelessly trying to recruit me.  Especially IIT.  Multiple emails and snail mail cards, etc.  Yesterday, though, I received an email from Columbia inviting me to come to an informational meeting.  I hadn't even contacted them.  I assume they found my hit either here or through their website.  Still, pretty cool.

- I received a good performance review at work and, though people are always complaining that it doesn't happen, I received a  25 cent raise, which is substantial for them.  Yay me.

- Randy bought me a zoom lens for my camera, something I've wanted for a long time.  Now if only I could find time to use it!

- I'm about to pay off my credit cards.  And I have a little money coming my way from my grandfather's estate (paternal grandfather who died a couple of years ago, and whose estate has been a bone of contention ever since amongst my aunts and uncles).  I wasn't expecting anything from him; it's a pleasant surprise, if something like this can ever be called "pleasant."  Also, I know my grandmother left me a little money as well.  I'm not sure how much is left, though.  I told my aunt to use the money to take care of my grandmother in the nursing home if it was needed.  I don't know whether she did or not, but it was more important to me that my grandmother was cared for while she was alive.  We'll see. 

- Randy told me that he wants to take me back to Alaska for our 15th anniversary.  That's almost 2 years away, but it's something to look forward to.  We'll spend more time there, explore more, than we did before.  I'm so excited!  Then maybe I'll have a chance to use that zoom.

I think that's all.  I've hurt my back.  Nothing serious- badly knotted under the shoulder blade and reaching towards the spine.  It's painful, but it could be worse.  Given everything else that's going right, I can't really complain.

Oh, for those who asked a month or two ago, my vacuum is a Bissell Pet Hair Eraser. 

One can only hope...

When stocking the shelves at work, someone placed a book on dogs next to a Chinese food cookbook.

Just personally devastating.

Last weekend I had 3 quizzes (2 Bio and 1 Bio Lab) and a Statistics test.  I studied for Stats for 4 days, though most of it was review for me.  There was some new stuff mixed in, and I wanted to make sure I had a firm grasp on it.  I did all of the problems at the end of each section in the chapters, getting some right and working on the others until I understood what I was doing.  The test covered 2 chapters, and the prof had posted 2 practice tests, one for each.  Before taking the real test online, I took both practice tests and got 100 on both of them.  But when I started the test itself... it was awful.

The questions were confusing, worded oddly, leaving me to desperately try to figure out what it was asking of me.  I began to freak out, and that made it harder to remember the things that I knew cold.  In the end, I ran out of time before I could answer the last 2 questions.

I got a 65.

I was so mad that I threw my notebook, narrowly missing Randy because I didn't pay attention to where I was throwing it.  Being the sweetheart he is, he insisted that it came nowhere near him, and tried to comfort me.  But I had to be alone.  I sobbed.

My best friend from school called me later.  She got a 30 on it.  We resolved to talk to the professor the next day.  I knew it wouldn't do any good; he'd made it clear on the first day that there would be no leniency on any point in contention.  This makes him sound awful, but he really isn't.  He's just rigid when it comes to testing.  Anyway, I just felt the need to express my thoughts regarding the test itself.  Apparently, Kim and I weren't alone.  People stopped him before and after class, and he had received a lot of angry emails.  Didn't do any good.  I told him that I didn't like the way the questions were worded; it's confusing.  I've since requested- as crazy as it might sound to some- that he put harder, trickier questions on the practice tests so that we can be better prepared for what's on the actual test.  That, at least,  he has agreed to do.

The upshot is that I have to live with the 65, which is 1/5 of my grade for the class; the 5 tests given over the semester are our only grades.  Add this to my first test score of 100, and I now have an (unacceptable!) 82.5 average.  I can't screw up another test.

This sent me into a depression that lasted a few days.  I kept tearing up at first, but then went sort of numb.  I think I've finally snapped out of it, but it was a sucky week.  I haven't had a grade like that in 17 years.

Let's see if we can't end on a more cheery note...  let's take a look at my work week:

1.  There's a series of psychology books which has just come into our store.  Someone bought a sort of psych 101 book from the series, one on psychotherapy, and 2 about treating someone with substance abuse problems.  Know which book they chose not to buy?

The one on ethics.

Hm.

2.  Did you know that there are John McCain and Barack Obama paper dolls available?  Truly.  And not the sort of "let's dress them up funny because we don't like them" paper dolls, but regular paper dolls for children to play with.  It includes their families as well.  At least whoever it was who created them was bipartisan about it.

and finally-

3.  I was restocking the shelves when I came across a title on my list that wasn't on my cart.  I checked and checked again.  Then I got a wicked smile on my face.  Because really, how often do you get to go up to your supervisor and say:

"There's no Deep Sex on my cart!"

At the bookstore, titles are assigned shelves randomly, according to weight and available room.  One of the main rules for stocking the shelves (a.k.a. "bins") is that we don't put books which look similar, or which have similar titles, on the same shelf.  This is to prevent those of us who are picking books from grabbing the wrong one as we hurry to fill orders.

Today I needed to pick a book called "Sweet Jesus."  I went to the assigned bin and reached up.  I saw "Baby Bible" and grabbed it.  Upon further inspection, however, I realized that the words "Sweet Jesus" did not appear anywhere on the cover.  This seemed odd.  As I pondered the discrepancy, I suddenly noticed "Sweet Jesus" on the spine of a book right next to the bible.  I frowned, annoyed that someone put books so closely related beside each other.  But when I pulled the book down and saw the rest of the title, it made more sense.  It also made me laugh. 

Someone put "Baby Bible" next to "Sweet Jesus... I Hate Bill O'Reilly."

Either the placement of the books was an accident, or someone's sense of humor got the best of them.

At the bookstore where I work¹, we now carry the Underwear Repair Kit for men.

Guys, is this really on your chore list?


- take out the trash
- launder clothes
- inspect undergarments for rips or holes, then sew/velcro/duct tape them

?

Actually, I think it's pretty funny.  Which is good, because that was the spirit in which it was created.


1.  I feel the need to clarify, for the sake of those who don't know: despite the fact that I frequently link to Amazon for these posts, this is not, in fact, where I work.  I just don't want to name or link to my place of employment because I don't want them to discover this blog.

As I filled yet another order of crossword puzzle books, I suddenly had a thought:

Wouldn't it be fun to bring one of the books home, do all of the crosswords, then smuggle it back to the store to be sold?  Can't you just see the recipient's face when he receives it?

This is what happens when work doesn't fully occupy the mind.

No blogging last night; a storm moved into the area and I decided to just shut my computer off and unplug it.

I managed to make it through 4 hours at work yesterday before needing to come home.  This makes sense considering I've been  stuck on the couch for 2 weeks.  I wasn't sick, just exhausted.  And yes, I know how lucky I am to have a job which allows me to leave whenever I want.  Especially one that surrounds me with books!

Speaking of which, I've discovered that we carry a book on "Extreme Pumpkin Carving."

sigh

Why must everything be "extreme" these days?  It's ridiculous!  What's next, extreme toenail clipping?  Extreme nose picking?

Honestly.

I suppose I'm getting better.  I'm still dealing with stomach pains and cramping, but I'm more alert now.  Do you know, I've actually gone days without turning my computer on at all.  Now, I stay off of computers when I'm on vacation, so it isn't unprecedented.  But I never go a day at home without at least checking my email.  But I did this week.

To be fair, I was totally absorbed by the Twilight Saga.  I read all 4 books (Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn), twice.  I became totally immersed, and am already missing the characters I grew to love.  This series isn't for everyone, of course, and I wouldn't insist that you all read it.  It's become a permanent part of my collection, though, and I would recommend it to those of you who are at all intrigued.

Other than reading and watching the Olympics, I haven't done much.  I tried to go to work on Monday, and I made it through 2 hours.  My boss took one look at me when I walked in and tried to send me home, but I wanted to give it a shot.  By the end of the 2nd hour, though, my legs burned as though I'd just run miles.  She told me to just stay home until I'm well, so that's the plan.  I need money though, so it's a short-term plan.

If I'm strong enough, Randy is going to drive me to school tomorrow to get my books while there are still some used copies to be had.  I went online to the school's bookstore; if I only buy used, and only buy the required books and not the recommended ones as well, I'm looking at $500 minimum.  And on a side note, why not just call Human Biology "Anatomy and Physiology" if every textbook and supplementary material is called "Anatomy and Physiology?"  Only the lab book has the words "Human Biology" in it.  Time to buy Anatomy and Physiology Demystified and Anatomy and Physiology for Dummies, I think.  I believe that's about my level right now.  I'm so not ready for this coming semester.

I think it would be cheaper and easier to drop out of school to give birth to a herd of elephants, than to finish my education.

No wonder I don't feel well.